Disappointment sucks. The higher your hopes, the further the fall when disappointment hits. Can you avoid it? How do you take away the sting?
Let me tell you a story. Forty or fifty years ago, a little girl was getting ready for Christmas. She had spotted a pair of red patent leather shoes and in her heart of hearts that is all she wanted. She pictured herself wearing them as her friends oohed and ahed with admiration and jealousy.
Every time she walked by the store window in her little town, she stopped to admire those beautiful shoes.
When the big day finally arrived, she ran to the Christmas tree and sure enough, there was a shoe box shaped present with HER name on it!! Eagerly she waited for her mom to distribute the gifts. With bated breath she held the small box with the santa paper and red bow.
At last it was her turn, she tore through the paper and sure enough, is WAS a shoe box. Heart racing, she tossed away the lid and her heart sank in disbelief. In the box, wrapped in tissue was a jump rope. Too young to hide her disappointment, she burst into tears and ran out of the room.
Her mom, unaware of her secret wish, reacted as many of us do. She frowned and told her to be grateful, that other children had to do without at Christmas and that she should be ashamed of herself.
The roots of disappointment are deep in all of us. There is no escape. So it is a curse, right?
Nope, dead wrong. Disappointment is an OPPORTUNITY. Tough things happen to each and everyone of us. Because our imaginations are so strong and we anticipate what we THINK will delight us, we set ourselves up for disappointment all the time. Why?
Because with each adult disappointment we can go back and relieve the remnants of childhood misperceptions. Countless times through our growing up years we are faced with making decisions on our child like perceptions.
One of these decisions is often….disappointment sucks and if I try hard enough, I will never be disappointed again. The problem with that decision is that it makes no sense at all.
Imagine if Walt Disney let disappointment stop him….would he have, could he have persevered through 299 bank loan denials before the 300th bank said yes?
Imagine if Thomas Edison let disappointment stop him before he finally succeeded in developing the light bulb?
Disappointment is a treasure. The worse it hurts, the more power there is under it to blast you to a new level of relationship success. Hiding from disappointment does not make it go away., it only paves the way for deeper pain the next time.
Learn to use the power in disappointment to unearth past hurts that are ready to be released. That was then and this is now. Make a new choice for yourself about the dramas of the past and you will find the patience and wisdom you need to talk to your man about what is bothering you.